"Has the baby arrived yet?!"
So, baby has not arrived yet, you are past your “estimated due date”. Statistics show approximately 90% of babies are born between 37 and 41 weeks gestation. If you have told people your estimated due date (EDD), they may start pestering you as early as 37 or 38 weeks about whether you have had baby or not. Some may even ask when you are ‘booked’ to have baby assuming you will have an induction or cesarean as this seems to be getting more and more common.
This is a really good reason to introduce, at the start of your pregnancy, a “due month” so this will hopefully buy you time and be less stressful at the end of your pregnancy. For instance, if your EDD is 22 August then you might tell people you are due around mid-August to mid-September. Some may push you for the actual date but you can just remind them that the date is superfluous and baby will come when they are ready.
Here some things to say to people, when baby is overdue... and people keep asking!
“You will be one of the first to know”
Tell people that you have made up a ‘birth notice’ group on your phone and you or your partner will send out a group text letting people know when baby has arrived and when it is OK to visit.
“I am feeling calm and relaxed about baby coming when they are ready, please stop asking”
This is letting people know that you are going with the flow and surrendering to the process - if you are not stressed, why should they be?
“Believe me, I want to meet my baby as much as you obviously do, please be as patient as I am being, baby will come when they are ready!”
This speaks for itself, I mean really, we are not going to be pregnant for 2 years like an elephant is, the baby is going to be born, stressing the Mama out is not going to do anyone any good.
“I notice you are asking me regularly if baby is here, I will post on Facebook when baby is born so can you keep an eye on my page rather than texting or messaging me?”
These days, births are generally announced on Facebook or other social media pretty quickly and so re-directing people to there will hopefully get them off your back!
“Thanks for asking if baby is here, nope, I am still pregnant but I am really enjoying everyone asking me if baby is here, as you can imagine!”
Sometimes a spot of sarcasm is called for in these situations!
And just for fun…
“Oh didn’t you hear, I had the baby 3 weeks ago!”
“I haven’t had the baby as I have signed up to be part of an experimental trial where women stay pregnant for 2 years to see if babies are as healthy as elephants when they are born.”
Just remember, this is your journey and you may not necessarily be able to have much control over what people say to you but you can control how you let it affect you. If people say something stupid to you during your pregnancy, whether it be about your size or when the baby is coming. Stop. Take a breath. Or three. Let the words zoom past you. And repeat after me, “I am cool, calm and collected”, “I am staying calm for my baby”, “What other people say does not affect me - it is their stuff”.